Wednesday, April 16, 2008

All By Myself

I had an all by myself outing yesterday! That’s right, I went out… just me, no kids. I took the 20-minute drive to the neighboring town to Wal-Mart. I needed it, I have known for a few weeks now that I needed this. Not because I was frustrated with the kids. It had just been awhile and I was ready for some good old “me time”. It was quite the little adventure.

I excitedly got into the car! I had kissed everyone good-bye and left the house without an infant car seat balanced in one hand or a tiny two year-old gripping the other. It took less than a minute to get into the car. No climbing into the back like a contortionist. Trying to reach across seats to buckle this seatbelt or pull down this handle. Just like that I was in and I was off… almost. I was just about to back out of the garage when I had to get back out, open the back door and like a contortionist, reach across seats to pull down the restraining bar on my son’s car seat. That’s right, no children with me and I still found myself having to buckle up a car seat. That great big bar that usually hold’s Buddy in place was raised up and obstructing my view. The only way to get it out of the way was to buckle it in place. Then I was officially off. I was in the car a good 5 minutes singing along to “kiddy” songs before I realized. “Wait a second there is no one under the age of 23… okay, okay no one under the age of 27 in the car, I could listen to grown up music!” I am not even sure where my own CDs are anymore so I opted for the radio. My options where country, no thank you! Or Spanish, no gracias! I found one other station coming in clearly and settled on that. I am still not sure what it was I was listening to but I do know that at one point a very “masterpiece theater” sounding voice came over the air waves to read a poem that I did not understand. I do know it was not taken from any of the Dr. Seuss books we own. Something about love or friendship… I don’t know. I soon tuned out the voices on the radio and subconsciously began my own radio show. My mind raced through every childish song I could think of. I laughed to myself as I made up a new version to one of my own favorite classics. It sounds something like a broken record and summarizes the last four years of my life.

N and Sarah sittin’ in a tree
First comes love
Then comes marriage
Then come a baby in a baby carriage
Then come a baby in a baby carriage
Then come a baby in a baby carriage

I laughed myself silly over that one. I realize now it is really not that funny but I can console myself with the fact that at least my children were not in the car to witness my temporary mental melt down.

Before I knew it I was at “Mart” as my children call it. I am not sure how many times I circled the parking lot looking for an empty spot next to a cart corral I lost count. It was not until after I had congratulated myself for having found one and parked the car that I realized I could have parked wherever I wanted.

I was up and down the aisles, through the checkout line, and back in the car in the time it would have taken me to get the kids unloaded from the car and into a cart. I found myself tempted to pull a few things from the shelves, yell at the top of my lungs once or twice and pee right in front of the potty just so Wal-Mart would know that a representative from our family had been there. (I did all but the last one. That one was just too much for me.)

Back in the car I decided that plain old silence would suit me just fine for the trip home. You want to know how I spent my precious silent moments? Thinking about my three sweet children at home and crying over them. I am so proud of the little people they are becoming. I called to mind countless little things they had done that day to make me smile and fill my heart with laughter.

Not to say I won’t have another outing alone sometime. I think I am a better mom for it. But I found myself appreciating all the time I had with them today, all the little things. And I am now ready to jump back in there for another round!

1 comment:

  1. Very funny post. Clicked on you from Humor Blogs.

    Come check me out sometime.

    I only have one so far, but can also relate to not getting out on my own very often.

    -- Jonny's Mommy


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