I stepped outside, asked questions, did some CSI work, solved the crime and saved the day! One minute later, a hysterical 7 year old came in to say he had been called the "S word". Not the adult version, not even the kid version. Because his sister is a good kid and tries really hard to follow the rules she did not call her brother stupid. She actually told him that he was the "S word". And five minutes after my facebook post, my home, that had once been filled with noise and energy was blustering with cries and whines. My kids, who had just five minutes earlier been deemed, AWESOME, looked like this...
Fights had broken out in twos and the kids were in the house, on the couch - learning to appreciate each other while holding hands.
But something good came out of this. After all of that I still thought my kids were awesome, I was still loving having them home, and feeling blessed to be their mommy! This was huge! It was only a few short years ago that on our best days, during even the most precious moments I was wondering how I had ended up here and why in the world I was spending my life doing something so meaningless, raising kids. That's it, nothing really important.
This change did not come about overnight. I did not wake up one morning with mommy revelation! I have prayed and asked to learn to be content right where I am at and God has faithfully given me that contentment. My children have come home telling about the people they have ministered to at school. The kids are not aware that is what they are doing. They are loving the God they are getting to know through us and sharing that love with friends and teachers. And little by little I am beginning to realize how important my job is - what a difference I am making in a school, in the home of a teacher, in the life of other little boys and girls just by doing my job here at home. God has convicted me about making our house more home like, a place that our kids look forward to coming back to. It may not be huge or all that new but it can be safe, cozy and clean. This job is a big job, an important one, and it was given to me - of all people! And suddenly here I am loving this life and enjoying my children in a way I have longed to. And I get to do it all again tomorrow, and the next day, and the next day, and the next...

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